Husband left me yesterday. Not completely, thank God, although I recently had a nightmare that he was filing for divorce on the grounds of embarrassment. I have a clear and audible voice which he finds acutely embarrassing in public situations, he on the other hand mumbles, which I find annoying. And talking of dreams I had one where my sister was telling me I was starting to look really old.  My jaw particularly was alarming. "It must be really difficult", she empathised.

But no, jaw is still reasonably decent and husband has not left me completely, but just gone to visit his family. Although it is for four weeks. FOUR WEEKS! I'm already beginning to forget what he looks like.

But luckily I am a calm and undramatic adult, so I wasn't crying all the way home on M4 after taking him to Heathrow yesterday. And I didn't smell his T-shirts when I got home, because that would have been just silly and a kind of a chick-lit cliche, which obviously doesn't happen in real life at all.

But as an ever-devoted wife during the last week before his departure I focused on managing the volume of my conversation in public places and cooking him his favourite foods to make sure he will come back to me.




I asked him everyday what he would like for dinner and his requests were lovely and simple like seafood pasta, which I made on his last day here and true to my incapability to manage the amounts I cook I am now left with a massive container that would probably still feed about 60 people.

Another request was boiled potatoes (like my mum makes them) and roast chicken legs, But then his younger kid announced that he would be coming for dinner and to stay with a friend of his, so I changed the boiled potatoes to home-made oven chips, because of lack of evidence of teenagers' love for boiled potatoes. I made 20 buffalo chicken wings, 6 large chicken thighs and 9 drumsticks with lemon, garlic and herbs and 1.5 kg of oven chips, with a big loaf of garlic bread thrown in. And almost all was polished off.

Husband's kid is a good eater, but his friend was just awesome. I love it when people eat a lot. I told the guy he can definitely come again! Maybe it was just different food from what he normally gets, or he's just a big eater, but for a skinny teenager (and I am used to skinny hungry teenagers) he really could put it way. On the way back home after my substantial breakfast spread munching through the container of peanut butter cookies I had packed with them he had told my stepson that "She's a really good cook!"

My steak and chip dinner wasn't a request by husband per se, but it's a lovely man-meal that he is not going to get in the next few weeks.

I have become really good at barbecuing steaks. I don't really like to fry them on the pan anyway anymore because of the amount of smoke and smell in the house. And the sound of the fire alarm. It's not as bad as at my sisters' where every time she is frying steaks the fire alarm goes off and they then also get a call from the security company and have to insert passwords into all kinds of systems to avoid the fire brigade arriving. Maybe it's payback for being so judgmental about other people's  perfectly normal jawlines.

So I won't let seasons deter me from my coal barbie, but will keep going through the winter. With steaks you don't have to stay outdoors for that long, just quickly pop the steaks on and go back to turn them once or twice. Probably not more than a minute of mandatory outdoor time. I am a hardy arctic fox after all.

Sometimes I cook the steaks just as they are, or maybe with just some herbs and of course salt and pepper, but sometimes I love to marinade the steaks. This marinade is absolutely awesome, I have used it on fillet and sirloin steaks and boy are they amazing every time. This time I thought these might have been the best steaks I've ever had. If these won't bring husband back to me, then I don't know what will.

Marinated sirloin steaks

2 sirloin steaks, thick cut and matured
1/3 cup olive oil (or vegetable oil)
2 cloves garlic - minced
1 tablespoon red wine vinegar
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/3 cup red wine
2 tbsp chopped fresh rosemary
1 teaspoon black pepper

Mix all the marinade ingredients in a plastic bag. Remove all visible fat from the steaks and add the steaks to the bag rubbing the marinade all over the meat. Refrigerate overnight or for a few hours turning once or twice.

Take out 3-4 hours before cooking to get properly into room temperature.

Get your charcoal grill going or whatever method you are using. You can fry in a pan, but whatever you use, make sure it's hot.

Fry 3-4 minutes each side seasoning lightly with salt once done. Let rest for 5 minutes in a warm place and serve with healthy side dishes like oven baked sweet potato chips, asparagus and salad
.